Good morning, lovebirds! It’s Valentine’s Day, which means everyone hates you what with the kissing and the petting and the pet names! You’re a smoochy face. No you’re a smoochy face. No you’re a…Sigh. It’s enough to make folks feel sympathetic toward the chainsaw-wielding maniac chasing you through the woods. It seems silly that you’d be on my site at a time like this, but I’m not gonna complain if there’s clicks to be made. Here, I’ll even help. Shoo. Shoo, monster. You’re welcome.
You are all my Valentine today, of course, but one special subscriber is going to win some free weed. And because I realized the old system kinda sucked, I’m just gonna pull the winner today. We’ve got enough subscribers now I don’t need to delay the thing a week anymore (but still need MOAR so sign up please thank you!)
And you’ll also like your floral arrangement from I71 delivery favorite PuffPuffDC, which will include three eighths to share with your sweetheart or barely-tolerable, I’m not gonna judge your relationships. You’ll definitely get some Lamb’s Breath, a classic Jamaican sativa that I absolutely could not find as a resort tourist when I went, but will be hand delivered to you, by me, the Gentleman. Go check your emails right now! You might have won. No? Did you check your spam? Ok, I’ll wait while you sort through all the Viargrara. All the other usual rules still apply!
- You have to be 21 or older for me to gift you these items. You better believe I’m gonna check your ID unless you have a ZZ Top beard. If you are three kids standing on each other’s shoulders in a trench coat, I’m definitely going to figure it out.
- You have to meet me in DC. We’ll make arrangements.
- I’ll use the Random Number Generator to get a number. If it corresponds to your Subscriber number, hooray!
- You have 48 hours to respond to my email. If I don’t hear from you, I’m picking another winner. Them’s the breaks!
- I won’t publish your name or photo or anything unless you’re cool with it.
- TOTALLY FREE. You don’t have to buy a tee shirt or a sticker or anything. This is just me saying thanks for reading, smoochy-face.
- Subscribe and you’ll be signed up for our next giveaway. If you already subscribed, you don’t need to Subscribe again. You’re all set!