February Hemper Box

Hemper Box closed

The February Hemper Box is here! The Gentleman is a big Hemper fan. I’ve reviewed a handful of subscription boxes for stoners and The Hemper Box is my favorite so far. The monthly bong or dab rig you get is an attractive piece of glass that’s fun, not kitsch; functional, but never basic. Plus you get some other useful gear, smoking essentials, and always-welcome cleaning supplies. Ok ok let’s see what we got this month already!

Hemper Feb UFO Rig

See what I mean? Hemper’s UFO bong unique shape is pretty slick and the spaceship itself flows right into the piece creating a nifty handle, while a confused cow adorns the side, getting tractor-beamed up along with an ultra-smooth hit through the stem’s row of diffusers. Beyond that, we got a torch and a rubber ashtray with a bowl-clearing spike in the middle, both of which I can put to use right this minute. Yeah, actually, can you excuse me a sec? Ahh. Thank you. Beyond that, we got:

  • Hemper Neon Doob Tube (to hold your joint!)
  • OCB organic hemp papers
  • RAW filter tips
  • Twisted Hemp 100% natural wraps
  • HemperTech HempWick, Microbeaded Freshwipes, and Odor Eliminating Spray (which I also used just now)

You can get all that shipped to your door for $30! Never face the outside world again! Shun it if you so choose! SHUUUUUN IT. If you want a February Hemper Box- they’re going fast (82% sold out as of this writing)- please use your Gentleman’s affiliate link to purchase so I can afford to go out to dinner by myself on Valentine’s and stare longingly at couples while sighing at a volume loud enough they must have heard me, cuz restaurants won’t let you do that for very long if you only order water and I’d like to freak some people out. I get bored being stuck in your computer all the time. And you look at a disturbing amount of porn. I’m just sayin, no judgment here, letting you know I’m here if you need to talk.

ICYMI, here’s what the January ’19 Hemper Box looked like:

Hemper Box Jan19

Aaaaand the Dabbing Granny glow-in-the-dark spiderweb rig (oh, so much squee!) from the October box I  reviewed, in case you’re thinking to yourself that maybe you want to spring for a subscription instead of a single box so you never miss out on any cool stuff or whatever…