This is by far the most boring apocalypse. No swelling swarm of self-replicating nanobots. No super-hurricanes. Not a single radioactive kaiju or kraken! I was prepared for fast rage-zombies and a bit of the ‘ol ultraviolence. Instead we’re twiddling our thumbs watching our paychecks drain away roll by roll, but not to worry, cuz we’ve gotta one-time stimulus of $1200 whole bucks coming our way in, like, May? Huzzah for the Corporati! It is our great honor to give our lives for the glory of the Bull Market God. May he make it rain upon your personal portfolios a thousand-fold, oh Titans of Industry, and dare I say, our hearts? Anyway, here’s a review of the Blueberry Pie flowers from one of my favorite I71 delivery & pick-up brands, Baked DC.
Baked DC’s site is straightforward. A number is provided to text if you’d like to make an appointment (202-230-2463). You can browse the day’s gift menu online. The pick-up location is conveniently located in the Dupont Circle/Downtown area. Delivery is available, but for members only, which you qualify for after your first pick-up appointment.
If you’d like, you can get a free marijuana gift with a minimum purchase of $50, a modest entry point when you have a look around other I71 gift brands, especially considering their consistent flower quality. Speaking of!
Baked DC’s Blueberry Pie flowers are simply gorgeous. These perfectly manicured buds are colored a deep, luscious green, layered with trichomes, and contrasted by dark orange hairs. The nugs are of the ideal, Boyz II Men density- not too hard, not too soft- and still supple out of the bag.
The scent profile is subtle and sweet, reminiscent of its namesake pastry. A dash of sugar, a spoonful of berry, a sprig of springtime flora and we got ourselves a party, or a shindig, possibly even a hootenanny, if I may be so bold. The smoke itself is smooth, with a bit of flavor and nary a cough, so as not to alarm Big Brother watching through your smart TV that your organs are tainted by the Corona and your meatbag is no longer of use to the State.
Baked DC has this flower listed under their Top Shelf tier as a hybrid. I’d agree with that classification here, but it certainly leans indica in my trials. This Blueberry Pie’s potency is certainly adequate, I’d guess low 20% THC, and a bit of a creeper. I feel like I can smoke more after a small bowl, but I didn’t make it far after doubling up before I had to eat and lie down for a few minutes.
While I didn’t detect any citrus in the aroma, the effects evoke the memory of limonene-rich strains. My thoughts quiet down and the world looks brighter, colors more vivid, and music more vibrant, lush even, like this Robotaki. You’re welcome.
It’s not so heavy that you won’t be able to get work done, possibly with some caffeine assisting, but you’re barking up the wrong tree if you need to get work done from home, as Blueberry Pie keeps leading me back to the couch to drudge through Pokemon Sword until I get my ultra-rare shiny Dreepy. Sure, I could use this time to read or, like, learn the bass guitar, but I’m not gonna let this virus change my behavior, otherwise the terrorists win.
Check out Baked DC’s website or call 202-230-2463 to set your appointment and get your nitrile gloves on some premium flower and edible gifts! Stay safe, everybody.